Sunday, July 30, 2006

Its funny, this blog has lost a large chunk of its existence because it is not read. It has become a repository of my thoughts and moods, and mostly a catharsis tool to help me cope with some moods that I get in.

Loneliness is horrible. Staying home alone is horrible. And I believe that a lot of people are lonely, society is moving towards more and more loneliness. Beatle's song, Eleanor Rigby, is nothing compared to the way that people live today. Aging also enforces loneliness; when you can live and be ok alone is probably one of the biggest sign that one has aged (not matured, aged I say).

Art is wonderful when you are alone. Tonight I am alone, but I am listening to music, writing and sharing another photo album online. My music is from the Internet, I am writing on the Internet, my photo album is on the Internet. Conclusion: the internet is wonderful when you are alone. True, the Internet pushes us to be more alone sometimes, but tonight, having no one to open my mouth to, the Internet is really helping me.

The hardest part of being lonely is having no one to talk to. Or maybe it is having no one to look at. I am not sure anymore, but my mouth sure aches to talk to someone. It feels like years since it hasn't been opened, it is hurting, even though less than two hours ago I spoke on the phone with a friend from the other side of the globe, alone too, in his apartment, just like mine probably, but in another time zone.

Yet there are people in my time zone alone too. I don't know, tonight I feel like the villages of once were much more humane than the cities of today. We are getting closer but really further than ever. I know, it's a regular cliché that half brained goons can shoot you, but tonight it feels so real to me, so true.

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